Saturday, June 28, 2008

My Toddler is Going To Hell

Either that or just driving me crazy as just punishment for things I have done in my past. Something like that.

Lets look at the facts, shall we?

Braeden (The Boy) is 34 1/2 months old. He will be three in early August. When he was born, he had reflux. He nursed for 12 weeks and was not toooooo bad. He went on formula and then a different one and then a different one. We finally found one that seemed to help with the worst of it. We still spent his first six months dealing with constant spit up and no sleep. He screamed. All the time. It was bad.

Then he got a little better. He only screamed part of the time. And he hated going to sleep. The boy has only slept through the night maybe ten times in the past three years. Really. He will NOT go to bed without a fight. I am talking about kicking, hitting, biting, screaming, head butting, body thrashing fights. And hours of putting him back in bed every five minutes until he finally breaks down and falls asleep. Usually in the hallway.

And then there are the night terrors. And the sleep walking.

And a total refusal to nap at all.

So, is it any wonder the boy has behavior issues? He has never, not once in three years, gotten a good night's sleep. He has so-so sleeps. He has good mornings where he is pleasant and easy to be around and cooperative and only misbehaves in normal 3 yo ways. And then... by lunchtime... he melts down. He kicked me in the face the other night and I lost it. I started crying on the phone with my MIL and telling her that if he is not crazy by this point in the sleep deprivation cycle that I probably am!

Today, we went to Walmart. Which is a whole other blog post. But, the part of this that pertains to THIS post is that... my children are embarrassing. Really. Both boys spent the entire trip whining and crying and trying to climb out of the buggy. And then I noticed that they both had dirt on their faces. So, now I look like some kind of redneck, dirty kid, cannot control their kids mom. And they probably have 12 toes too.

I know that all kids give you hassles. God knows that I had to drag The Girl out of stores more than once when she was 3 - 4 yo. But.... maybe it is just that I lack the patience to deal with this. I would almost rather become a hermit than deal with this level of.... misbehavior... in public. For lack of a better word.

And he At all. I feel like the three male people who live in my house cannot seem to hear the tone of my voice. I speak. I know I am speaking. I can hear myself. But, no response. I could be speaking klingon and dancing naked for all of the attention they pay to me.

I try. Goddess knows I try. I try to teach them to pick up their toys. And not eat each others bodily excretions. And maybe not grind chocolate into the carpet. And I try to teach them not to hurt each other. And to share. And to please please please not bite mommy. And I try to get them to understand that cooperation is best. Yeah right.

Toddlers. They are going to hell.

Wait. I am in hell now, aren't I?


Anonymous said...

Oh honey... that is terrible. Just keep telling yourself... they will gro out of it. They are good boys, they are JUST boys. I miss you! ::HUGS::

Laura ~Peach~ said...

My cory was like that... we finally figured out in the third grade that he has ADHD with an emphasis on H! Food colorings and sugars set him off, certian preservatives set him off and as he got older it intensified, I thought I was a horrid mother but now i know there was more to it... we tried special diets OMG what a nightmare...finally he wa sput on Ritalin and WHAT A DIFFERENT KID! he was able to think straight the bursts of rage were nearly gone he could SLEEP! this kid had not slept for 8 years more than 2 hours at a time ... Cory was the kid who woudl get on the trampoline and RUN in circles on it for HOURS at a time... he never walked as a baby HE RAN... and I agree with you them being tired does not help.... I know people say don't use drugs to help your kid but they have never had a kid that was honestly ADHD... he was never a ZOMBIE on the meds ... he was finally a so called normal kid able to pay attention (cory was always brilliant in school never has done home work in his life) He was able to start and complete a task, able to play with out a meltdown and finally ABLE to SLEEp... I feel your pain I really do ... and there is the possibility that your baby is like cory was... it is worth checking into... COry is 20 and old enough now to know when he is out of control... he stopped the meds at age 13... he knew he was losing it lately and carried himself to the dr to get on adult ADHD meds cause he is still ADHD... and there has been a marked change in him in just two weeks.

Faerie Mom said...

Laura, I think he may be ADHD but they will not diagnose until school age. I do NOT want him on meds but.... this is getting out of hand. I am hoping that the appointments in July will give us some answers and maybe some ways to better deal with him. I am hoping for a scrip for melatonin and hoping it works! It is all natural and not a narcotic so I will feel better about giving it to him. When he is old enough... if it is necessary... of course I would do what needs to be done. But meds scare me! LOL Thanks for your comment. It is good to know that I am not alone in this.

Unka Paul said...

A scrip for melatonin??? Hun it's an ove rhte counter suppliment. You can buy it at any wal-greens in the vitamins isle. Ya don't need a script.

Faerie Mom said...

PAul, I know that. But, when you are talking about a 30 lb 3 year old you tend to want a doctor to give you correct doasge and info before just giving them something. I really don't want to screw around with dosages with the skinny one... know what I mean?

Nana The Nana said...

Good girl, you can't be to careful with ANY kind of medicine. You need to find the perfect affirmation to help with the boys and put it everywhere in you house! Something like,"I am a good mother, they will outgrow all the crazy stuff. Life will be normal today..." Then just keep repeating it all day long. I love you, wish I could help you more.

Bina said...

I would say yes, you are in toddler hell! And I'm not EVEN going to try and give advice cause I have never been there! And I can't imagine how grumpy I would be if I never got a good night's sleep either. It would probably drive me to the brink of giving Dimetap or something to make him sleep at least ONE night a week!

You poor thing. I can't imagine the stress. Oh, but like Laura peach said, my friend's child was a MONSTER! And she eventually found out he too had an allergy to different food colorings. Once she completely changed his diet, he was finally normal! LOL

Faerie Mom said...

Bina, UNFORTUNATELY, Dimetap makes him hyper. As does anything else we have tried up til now! LOL Rotten kid... LOL

Jessica said...

If it makes you feel any better this post made me feel a little better about myself. It makes me feel better because I know I'm not the only one that goes through those things now. It's not a flaw with's just a mom thing.

Poor little guys needs some sleep. I don't sleep well and I know how it affects me. Poor baby.

Here in the last few weeks my arm is adorned daily with baby bite marks. People have quit asking what happened.

I realized one benefit of my children being wild in wal-mart last night. The cashiers don't question any of my coupons because they just want me to get the hell outta there. My store tries to refuse IP coupons but I try to use one everytime I go and I haven't been refused the last several times. Each of those times Morgan is trying to climb on the baggage area and Brock is screaming trying to climb out of the buggy.