Thursday, December 10, 2009

THIS

...is a post.

I always have these great ideas for posts while I am doing something like washing clothes or wiping asses. And then they get sucked out of my head by the demon children.

So.

Here I am.

With nothing to write about.

Cause I am boring.

And my life is boring.

And my kids are soul sucking demon children with direct call lines to the devil. And Santa.

And my daughter is a grammar nazi blog beyotch. Who is reading over my shoulder and correcting my spelling before spell check can even highlight it.

Go away evil child.

The zombies will eat your brains.

(She says thats not nice. But really... she has a big, juicy brain. Of COURSE they will eat her brain.) (Dib.)

Anyway. Back to what I was writing before the evil grammar nazi child interrupted me.

*clears throat*

*coughs loudly to shut up the grammar nazi again*

(I know. You just wish you could see what my blog looks like before I use spell check...)

um.

What was I writing about again?

Cheese.

I love cheese. I love cheddar and parmesan and mozzarella and....

Oh.

You think cheese is boring? WHat about cheese fonbdue? *sutup Jenna*

(I am leaving my misspelled words and ham fingered typing just to irritate her)

(Of course she DOES know my password for blogger so if it shows up fixed... blame her)

ANYway.

I am bored. How come so few of you comment on my posts? Am I really THAT boring?!?

(Lie to me, please.)

If I ever write a post (not a giveaway) that gets a lot of comments I just may keel over. In a dead type way.

Jenna says to stop using her lines. But, she needs to stop reading over my shoulder and commenting out loud.

Just sayin.

NOW she wants to know if I love her. What? Why are you getting all wishy washy touchy feely on me now? I am TRYING to be a bizatch here. God.

I am not even repeating the insulting comment she just made about me. Cause she is MEAN! Mean I tell you!!!!!!!!


(MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA. This is ME, the DAUGHTER PERSON! I HIJACKED THE KEYBOARD!!! MUWAHAHA!!! I told the Mother-of-Mine that she is no longer chief bitch. 'Cuz I out-bitched her. And she is sour. 'Cuz I now have her crown.)

*Sounds of a scuffle as the keyboard is wresled away from the Daughter Person*

Haha. SHE misspelled that word up there. SHE did, the grammar nazi! LMAO as she throws herself ont he ground and beats her head on the floor....

OK.

Now, I promise.... really I do.... I promise to have a real post for y'all tomorrow. Really.

*wanders off in search of Jack and coke*

6 comments:

Alissa said...

I don't even have any demon children to blame all my lost blog ideas on. Helpful as that might be, I do not envy you your grammar police escort.

Connie Carpenter Macko said...

dear daughter person - queen bitch crowns are not so lightly wrestled from the heads of mothers! you may have been allowed to beleive that you temporarily had superiority - but we only do that to raise your sefl esteem becasue we love you. [misspelled words left to remain as a silent protest against authority] AND miss tracy - you are not boring. my theory is that we are both just so good at blogging that people are intimidated by leaving posts.

carry on!

The Girl Next Door Grows Up said...

I love this post! And I love the relationship between you and your daughter! You guys are cute!

I sometimes call my daughter Sybil.

Laura ~Peach~ said...

yeah what she said... LOL as in you my friend T ... thank you for the card it came today :)
HUGSSSSSSS and brainless posts rule!

Alissa said...

Just wanted to let you know you've won an award. There's a What Makes You Happy award waiting for you at my blog today.

Celia (Head Witch of the Hollow) said...

You are so funny!

My 19 year old son...who laughs at nothing...even laughed at this!!!

Great to meet another "sane-as-they-come" blogger lady!