Last week was hectic and crazy. Poor Jenna was sick all week. I mean sick. Like throwing up and unable to even keep down water for most of the week. For a teenager, in HS, with AP classes, this is a recipe for disaster. Luckily, she is well now and we were able to get some of her assignments last week so she will be somewhat caught up. But, she missed several tests that she now has to stay after school to make up, etc. Poor kiddo.
Thank goodness she is big enough to take care of her own throwing up issues now, though!
I had to cancel home visits from Malachai's speech therapist and his PAT teacher. Germs, ya'know. But, at least I didn't have to clean my living room when they came over. Yes, I was a lazy bizatch this week. I did very little cleaning in my house! And, I did not even cook most of the week. With Jenna sick and both Steven and I feeling kind of blah, there was no point in cooking big meals every night.
My friend Cindy B and I actually got to see each other for the first time all Summer. She came over and stole me away and we went to play tennis. Ha! Play. I have never played before so she ran me around the court chasing balls. But it was fun and one hell of a good work out.
My birthday was probably one of the best I have had in years. I went up tot he pizzeria, where Steven was working for the day, and had lunch with no kids. No interruptions! Then I had a re-certification appointment. After that, I had some presents from my daughter and mom. Then, I got to talk to my friends Paulie and Chelle. I miss them so much! And I talked to my mom, MIL and my brother. And I relaxed for most of the day! I did not cook dinner. When I went to pick up Steven from work, we stopped at a local sweet shop and coffee house and had pie and coffee for my birthday. It was really nice.
So, no big things last week, just crazy. I felt like I did not have enough hours in each day, even though I did not clean or cook nearly as much as I usually do!
I am planning my weekly menu but have not finished. I may post again later with it.
Boring. I know!
Monday, August 31, 2009
Friday, August 28, 2009
Birthday Wishes
Today is my birthday! I am off to have lunch... all by myself... with no kids.... hehehe. I can't wait to eat a meal with no interruptions! I will post again soon. I am fine, calmed down, thanks for all the comments on my whiney post.
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Bitch, Whine, Moan, Piss, Argue and PMS!
Well, maybe not PMS. I haven't had a period since I got pregnant with Malachai... and he turned 2 in March! I love my IUD. BUT, I am definitely overly emotional lately. And irritable. Yesterday being a prime example.
While I love my husband, I do not always like him. And I sometimes want to bludgeon him with a large, heavy instrument of ... bludgeoning. Hell, sometimes I want to bludgeon him with a large, SHARP instrument! I knew what he was like when I married him. Damn, I knew what he was like when we got pregnant. And when we shacked up together. Why would I think he might change? Maybe because I have? And because we should all adapt to circumstances? And be partners in this marriage? Support each other in the face of overwhelming parenting hardships? Keep a united front against the enemy.... erm.... I mean our kids?
Yesterday was one of Steven's days off. He works really hard. I mean, 12 - 16 hour days five days a week. As a chef. In a hot kitchen, on his feet. I know it is tiring. I think I am very understanding. I generally let him sleep in and expect very little from him in the way of help around the house. But, I do expect a little something from him! Take the garbage out, mow the yard when it needs it so I do not have to try to juggle the kids and a mower, hang things up on the walls for me, change diapers when he is home, spend some time with the kids... maybe take them out to play or at least keep an eye on them so that I can get things done when he is home!! Instead, he usually spends most of his days off sleeping, on the computer, sitting on the couch watching TV, etc. He only does things if I ask directly and then I end up with a sighing attitude like I am interrupting something important rather than the 100th rerun of a show he has seen before.
I get tired of it.
I get tired of having to ask for help. Or ask him to spend time with HIS children. Or, for god's sake, pay a little attention to me.
The thing with Steven is that he really does not care if the house is clean. He would not care if I never cleaner or cooked or washed clothes. As long as he has what he needs when he needs it, the rest does not matter. So, he sees all that I do around the house as unnecessary I guess. So, when I spend a day cleaning and cooking, he does not even notice. He says nothing. I cook his favorite meal for him and get no thanks.
He does not read my blog. He does not read any of the articles that I write unless I specifically ask him to. He does not care. There is no support there. At all.
Sometimes I wonder why he married me if he thinks so little of me. If I did not tell him about my day, he would never ask. He would never ask about the kids either. I wonder how long I could go telling him nothing before he noticed and bothered to ask?
Yesterday I had had it. And I asked him if he wanted a divorce. He was shocked and asked me if I did. I said no but that it seemed like he didn't really want a wife and kids. Then I walked outside to smoke. He ended up coming out to watch the kids for a bit after that. I really think the man is just clueless.
I try not to fight with him. I have a very bad temper and I know that I would say or do things that I might regret if I talked to him while upset. But, something has to give. I need some support and appreciation occasionally. I need him to treat me as a partner and not just his roommate that he sleeps with. I need him to realize that I need more. And, dammit, I need a break sometimes. 24 hours a day, 7 days a week with the WIngmen of Mayhem has left me exhausted in every possible way that there is.......
Maybe it is time to have a long talk about what his and my expectations of each other are. I am not willing to let this go and let my marriage slide into mediocrity. I am not willing to lose why we love each other and why we are together because we are exhausted.
Any suggestions?
While I love my husband, I do not always like him. And I sometimes want to bludgeon him with a large, heavy instrument of ... bludgeoning. Hell, sometimes I want to bludgeon him with a large, SHARP instrument! I knew what he was like when I married him. Damn, I knew what he was like when we got pregnant. And when we shacked up together. Why would I think he might change? Maybe because I have? And because we should all adapt to circumstances? And be partners in this marriage? Support each other in the face of overwhelming parenting hardships? Keep a united front against the enemy.... erm.... I mean our kids?
Yesterday was one of Steven's days off. He works really hard. I mean, 12 - 16 hour days five days a week. As a chef. In a hot kitchen, on his feet. I know it is tiring. I think I am very understanding. I generally let him sleep in and expect very little from him in the way of help around the house. But, I do expect a little something from him! Take the garbage out, mow the yard when it needs it so I do not have to try to juggle the kids and a mower, hang things up on the walls for me, change diapers when he is home, spend some time with the kids... maybe take them out to play or at least keep an eye on them so that I can get things done when he is home!! Instead, he usually spends most of his days off sleeping, on the computer, sitting on the couch watching TV, etc. He only does things if I ask directly and then I end up with a sighing attitude like I am interrupting something important rather than the 100th rerun of a show he has seen before.
I get tired of it.
I get tired of having to ask for help. Or ask him to spend time with HIS children. Or, for god's sake, pay a little attention to me.
The thing with Steven is that he really does not care if the house is clean. He would not care if I never cleaner or cooked or washed clothes. As long as he has what he needs when he needs it, the rest does not matter. So, he sees all that I do around the house as unnecessary I guess. So, when I spend a day cleaning and cooking, he does not even notice. He says nothing. I cook his favorite meal for him and get no thanks.
He does not read my blog. He does not read any of the articles that I write unless I specifically ask him to. He does not care. There is no support there. At all.
Sometimes I wonder why he married me if he thinks so little of me. If I did not tell him about my day, he would never ask. He would never ask about the kids either. I wonder how long I could go telling him nothing before he noticed and bothered to ask?
Yesterday I had had it. And I asked him if he wanted a divorce. He was shocked and asked me if I did. I said no but that it seemed like he didn't really want a wife and kids. Then I walked outside to smoke. He ended up coming out to watch the kids for a bit after that. I really think the man is just clueless.
I try not to fight with him. I have a very bad temper and I know that I would say or do things that I might regret if I talked to him while upset. But, something has to give. I need some support and appreciation occasionally. I need him to treat me as a partner and not just his roommate that he sleeps with. I need him to realize that I need more. And, dammit, I need a break sometimes. 24 hours a day, 7 days a week with the WIngmen of Mayhem has left me exhausted in every possible way that there is.......
Maybe it is time to have a long talk about what his and my expectations of each other are. I am not willing to let this go and let my marriage slide into mediocrity. I am not willing to lose why we love each other and why we are together because we are exhausted.
Any suggestions?
Monday, August 24, 2009
Menu Planning in the Midst of Madness
I am having a very bad day. I may blog about it tomorrow. For now, here is my menu plan:
Monday - Pulled Pork Sandwiches,Special Potato Casserole and Green beans or corn
Tuesday - hamburger gravy and rice
Wednesday - spicy honey chicken, Fried squash and brown rice patties
Thursday - spinach and mushroom manicotti with garlic knot rolls
Friday - leftovers or breakfast for dinner
Saturday - spaghetti pie
Sunday - swedish meatballs with egg noodles and green beans
For more menu ideas check out Organizing Junkie.
Monday - Pulled Pork Sandwiches,Special Potato Casserole and Green beans or corn
Tuesday - hamburger gravy and rice
Wednesday - spicy honey chicken, Fried squash and brown rice patties
Thursday - spinach and mushroom manicotti with garlic knot rolls
Friday - leftovers or breakfast for dinner
Saturday - spaghetti pie
Sunday - swedish meatballs with egg noodles and green beans
For more menu ideas check out Organizing Junkie.
Sunday, August 23, 2009
Fiving It Up!
Kayren at Everything's Coming Up Daisies recently had a post about fives. At the end, she offered to let any of her readers participate so,.... here is how it works!
Kayren gave me five particular words to blog about. The words were picked specifically for me after viewing my profile and blog. Cool, huh? Now I have to write about each one. If you want a chance to Five It Up, comment and ask for your words and I will pick some out for you! So, here are my special words!
Thrifty - I like the word thrifty... I like it better than frugal. Frugal sounds like a weird old guy who washes his zippie bags out and reuses his coffee grounds. Not that there is anything wrong with that. If that's what you do. heh. Thrifty brings to mind Moms and homemade cookies and Halloween costumes made out of recycled aluminum cans. And stuff. I like to be thrifty. Thrifty is like creative license to scrounge and scrimp. And it is respected in today's world! My Mother was thrifty before it was cool..... so was my Grandmother..... and her Mom. I think being thrifty is a great way to honor the women who have come before me and scrimped and saved to make my life a little bit better.
Cooking - Honestly? I really do not enjoy cooking all that much. I WANT to enjoy it. I love the end results and the feeling of actually feeding my family a healthy and nourishing meal. But I really dislike the process and the time it takes me. That's why I have been exploring Once A Month Cooking and crockpotting more recently. If I had all the money in the world I would probably never cook again. No, actually. I like being thrifty too much! I love finding new recipes and making great food, but I hate having to slave over a stove for so long. I need instant gratification, dammit!
Boys - Boys are sticky, sweet, gritty, dirty, simple and uncomplicated love. They are frogs and trains and mud and bugs and all of the icky things that they can find to show me. They are sticky kisses and snuggle time. They are frustrating, stubborn and pig headed. They are too smart for mommy and full of big plans and imagination stations. Boys are fun. Boys spit. Boys think poop is interesting. Boys think their mom is the prettiest, smartest, funniest woman in the world. Boys think their mom is Wonder Woman. Boys keep you busy all day long. Boys can get into trouble faster than you think. Boys should never be left alone in a room. Even if it is empty. They will find something to get into! I love my boys and would not know what to do without them. Even when they make me crazy! I want another boy......
Space - hmmm...... space. I need some. I need some time and space for myself. A place and a time to think my thoughts without the interruptions and questions and constant touching. Of course, if I got that space I would probably go crazy wondering what was going on without me!
Goat - My Aunt and Uncle had goats when I was a kid. I remember learning to milk a goat when I was about 5 years old. That was soooo cool. Goats eat things. Like a garbage disposal. I would love to have a goat. But, I could never eat goat. The word goat makes me think the meat would taste pretty rank. But I don't know, lots of people in the world eat goat. My kids "get my goat" on a regular basis. And goats rhyme with moats
LMAO
Want your five words? Let me know!
Kayren gave me five particular words to blog about. The words were picked specifically for me after viewing my profile and blog. Cool, huh? Now I have to write about each one. If you want a chance to Five It Up, comment and ask for your words and I will pick some out for you! So, here are my special words!
Thrifty - I like the word thrifty... I like it better than frugal. Frugal sounds like a weird old guy who washes his zippie bags out and reuses his coffee grounds. Not that there is anything wrong with that. If that's what you do. heh. Thrifty brings to mind Moms and homemade cookies and Halloween costumes made out of recycled aluminum cans. And stuff. I like to be thrifty. Thrifty is like creative license to scrounge and scrimp. And it is respected in today's world! My Mother was thrifty before it was cool..... so was my Grandmother..... and her Mom. I think being thrifty is a great way to honor the women who have come before me and scrimped and saved to make my life a little bit better.
Cooking - Honestly? I really do not enjoy cooking all that much. I WANT to enjoy it. I love the end results and the feeling of actually feeding my family a healthy and nourishing meal. But I really dislike the process and the time it takes me. That's why I have been exploring Once A Month Cooking and crockpotting more recently. If I had all the money in the world I would probably never cook again. No, actually. I like being thrifty too much! I love finding new recipes and making great food, but I hate having to slave over a stove for so long. I need instant gratification, dammit!
Boys - Boys are sticky, sweet, gritty, dirty, simple and uncomplicated love. They are frogs and trains and mud and bugs and all of the icky things that they can find to show me. They are sticky kisses and snuggle time. They are frustrating, stubborn and pig headed. They are too smart for mommy and full of big plans and imagination stations. Boys are fun. Boys spit. Boys think poop is interesting. Boys think their mom is the prettiest, smartest, funniest woman in the world. Boys think their mom is Wonder Woman. Boys keep you busy all day long. Boys can get into trouble faster than you think. Boys should never be left alone in a room. Even if it is empty. They will find something to get into! I love my boys and would not know what to do without them. Even when they make me crazy! I want another boy......
Space - hmmm...... space. I need some. I need some time and space for myself. A place and a time to think my thoughts without the interruptions and questions and constant touching. Of course, if I got that space I would probably go crazy wondering what was going on without me!
Goat - My Aunt and Uncle had goats when I was a kid. I remember learning to milk a goat when I was about 5 years old. That was soooo cool. Goats eat things. Like a garbage disposal. I would love to have a goat. But, I could never eat goat. The word goat makes me think the meat would taste pretty rank. But I don't know, lots of people in the world eat goat. My kids "get my goat" on a regular basis. And goats rhyme with moats
LMAO
Want your five words? Let me know!
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